McSweeney's Pieces:

So You've Knocked Over a Row of a Motorcycle Gang's Motorcycles, Again. 

​So You've Knocked Over a Row of a Motorcycle Gang's Motorcycles

When Dakota Fanning Travels to Spain for a Junior Semester Abroad, She Will Take Full Advantage of the Experience

Like It Or Not, You're No Bob Costas

My column, Sarah Walker Shows You How, on McSweeney's

McSweeney's Quarterly #35: A letter wherein I explain why Love Actually is a terrible movie.